some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
