I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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