Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
