Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
How many fucks given?
0.12846
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
