nut hugger
You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
