the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
