Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Randomize
