Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
