..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
