How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
