i think my tv is drunk
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
