I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
