dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
