Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
