My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
