his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I don't want my vagina anymore.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
