Pappa wants mamma naked
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Randomize
