then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
