There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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