Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
