That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize
