Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Fuck appropriateness.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Randomize
