I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
