I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I could make wine with my vomit
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize