He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize