You're so nebulous sometimes
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
