We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
