just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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