She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
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