I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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