if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
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