I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
