he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Randomize