My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize