There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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