Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Just puked most of my soul out..
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
