Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
