Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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