Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
