Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize
