Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
It's like God shit irony all over that family
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Randomize
