I'm so fucking centered right now
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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