Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
He is an equal opportunity slut.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
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