Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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