i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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