I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
i think im in europe. pls send help
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
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