I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Randomize