your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
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