I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
