is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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