Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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